
There's something almost spiritual about watching a football lifer play his final home game when he doesn't know it's his final home game. Taysom Hill yesterday became the first player in NFL history with over 1,000 career yards passing, rushing, and receiving. He did it in classic Taysom fashion, throwing a touchdown, catching passes, rumbling for first downs, and probably selling popcorn in Section 342 during halftime. This is a man who once had five different positions listed on his team bio, a walking middle finger to the fantasy football industrial complex.
His postgame interview vibrated with the energy of a man who just found his last check in a jacket pocket. Hill fought tears describing his family's presence, Kellen Moore's intentionality in giving him snaps, the weight of maybe not wearing black and gold again. It was like watching John Elway ride into the sunset if Elway occasionally blocked punts and played tight end. Every roster needs a Taysom Hill, the human glue that holds together the cracked vase of a disappointing season. For Saints fans, he's the embodiment of that beautiful Drew Brees quote where chaos meets competence.
Then there's Charlie Smyth. The man probably still calls cleats boots and helmets hats. A kicker from County Down, Northern Ireland, who tied a Saints record with five field goals in just his fourth NFL game. Try explaining to a GAA fan in Newry why 70,000 people scream when their cousin drills a ball between two sticks from 50 yards. The NFL's global talent mining operation keeps bearing fruit, albeit in unexpected positions. From German linebackers to British tight ends, we're seeing the globalization of a sport that once thought Vienna was just a sausage. Smyth's journey from Gaelic football to splitting the uprights in the Superdome deserves a 30 for 30 narrated by Liam Neeson.
Meanwhile, Cameron Jordan had himself a family reunion with two sacks and cardboard cutouts. At age whatever the fossils tell us, Jordan now has 130 career sacks, passing Saints godhead Rickey Jackson. His postgame quote about hitting the streets like Bourbon Street was hosting Mardi Gras in December captures this team's shrug at elimination math. Watch him play and you'd think the Saints were 10 5, not 5 10. That's leadership dressed as defensive end.
The Jets, though. Oh, the Jets. Their starting quarterback Brady Cook sounded like a man trying to describe a car crash he caused while reading Kierkegaard. Eight sacks taken. Twelve losses absorbed. Fifteen consecutive games without an interception. That last stat should hang in MoMA as performance art about defensive malpractice. Gang Green is inventing new ways to be bad, like a chef discovering a recipe combining burnt toast and battery acid.
Cook's postgame presser smelled of rookie despair. When your offensive line turns into revolving doors and your receivers run routes like they're avoiding landmines, no wonder the kid looked shell shocked. Remember when everyone roasted the Bears for starting Tyson Bagent too soon? Jets fans would kill for Bagent levels of competence right now. This isn't a rebuild, it's an archeological dig through decades of quarterback trauma.
Take a bow, New Orleans. Your Saints just messed around and found joy. A kicker discovering America one field goal at a time. A Swiss Army knife of a player writing his possible goodbye letter. A grizzled pass rusher treating December like his personal playground. This is why we watch football when the playoffs become mathematical impossibilities, for these small human victories against the colossus of entropy.
Contrast that with New York's football purgatory, where quarterbacks go to die young. Every Jets snap feels like watching a man try to build a house of cards during an earthquake. Their famous defensive guru head coach watched Cook get sacked eight times and said he gives them the best chance to win. That's NFL speak for, We traded our life raft for an anchor. Meanwhile, Zach Wilson is probably somewhere sipping mai tais and laughing like a Bond villain.
Hill's performance sparks bigger questions about player utility in modern football. Coaches slurp positional flexibility until someone asks them to actually use it. The Bears tried Cordarrelle Patterson under center as a joke, the Patriots used Julian Edelman at corner during emergencies. But Hill makes it foundational. He's a reminder that before specialization fossilized player roles, football was a game of athletes doing athletic things, regardless of what the laminated play sheet dictated.
Three thoughts to close that weren't on anyone's broadcast. First, Smyth's success echoes the quiet revolution of international kickers. From Norwegian Sebastian Janikowski to Aussie Michael Dickson, the NFL's getting schooled by specialists who grew up playing actual football, as in soccer. When will we see the first Brazilian placekicker who honed his craft bending free kicks around Ronaldinho?
Second, Cook's development arc mirrors what Bryce Young endured in Carolina last year. Throwing rookies into hopeless situations because the front office whiffed on veteran bridge QBs should be considered football malpractice. The Winston Rule: Every tanking team must employ a competent but boring vet to shield young passers. Colt McCoy is somewhere nodding sagely.
Lastly, Cameron Jordan deserves the Walter Payton Man of the Year award for playing like a HOFer on a 5 10 team. Charles Haley used to take plays off for better squads. Jordan is out here chasing ghosts and quarterbacks while knowing January means golf trips, not playoff prep. That's professional pride, the antidote to the modern athlete's load management obsession.
Tonight, somewhere in the French Quarter, Jordan's celebrating with cutouts of his own head. Hill's likely hugging his kids, wondering if he needs to hire movers. Smyth's explaining American football to cousins via grainy WhatsApp video. And in Florham Park, some Jets intern is probably editing together Brady Cook's lowlights reel while questioning life choices. Football isn't just about championships. It's about these strangely beautiful human pockets in otherwise lost seasons.
By Michael Turner